Setting Boundaries with Your Seven Year Old

Setting boundaries in a pretty much child led household is really difficult at first and it does take time to get everyone on the same track. The first thing you can do is to buy a whiteboard and mark it up with days of the week. Each day of the week there are set tasks so for example on a school day.

The simple tick list includes:

• Getting dressed

• Brushing hair

• Brushing teeth

• Making packed lunch

• Getting shoes, coat and book bag ready

• Hang Up coats

• Homework or Reading

• Make sure clothes washing is in the laundry bag

• Put away toys

• Clear the table after dinner

A simple check list which also includes responsibility as well as self care means that we haven't made it too complicated. Kids can easily see at a glance whether it's done what's expected or not.

Rewarding good behaviour has helped too.

This year we have introduced pocket money and for each day a completed check list is done. Earning days are set as Monday to Friday and they are free to spend it as they see fit.

Whether they save or spend it, that's their decision. Obviously this only covers certain boundaries but we have found a knock on effect of starting this way has meant we haven’t needed to set too many. Good behaviour is rewarded and behaviour that isn’t responsible to herself and others means that pocket money is deducted or screen time is limited.